Tuesday, December 25, 2012

It happened one moment...


Some stares locked away in those four walls
A hug that held back on the ledge of that 8th floor balcony
That bed was the first one we cuddled up and slept on
Right on this point of the earth, you first held my hand
We have a stolen kiss on that pavement
That lamp post, it united our shadows on the first date
That huge rock where we once scribbled our names

Those stars that we gazed at together, glimmering at the same spots 
The chilling water of that cooler that woke us every bottle-turn
Our first performance happened in that auditorium, on that very stage
That shoot when eyes met for the reel and heartbeats skipped for real
Alcohol bottles that still bring back picnics and road trips
The studio where darkness and favorite tunes had a blissful union in dance
A painting with our finger imprints once fresh, now dried


The slides and bars once gigantic, seem smaller now
The abandoned chair in the corner of the room had its prime too
The tooth that broke in a pillow fight that later progressed to fists
The ice cream stall where my tantrums always lost the battle
Occasions remembered through clothes, jewelry and photos
Pages of a diary where life and times attempted to stop themselves
Deja-vu moments - a dream or a past reality brought to life again?


Objects and places stay, it's time that keeps ticking by...

Monday, December 24, 2012

Saturday, December 22, 2012

Bounded


Yes, we are bounded by the laws of human society,
Else, every day would begin and end with your sight.
Else, your arms would be my resting place every moment.

Yes, we are bounded by commitments,
Else, we would retire to a jungle and live like nomads.
Else, we would randomly take the paths less taken.

Yes, we are bounded in other relationships,
Else, we would revel in playing each other’s whole and sole.
Else, priorities would never have been a matter of confusion.

Yet, we are bounded
Deeply bounded in one spirit, for a lifetime. 

Friday, December 21, 2012

The walk...


I see people walking around me. There is a certain rhythm in every footstep.  Each one has a vivid gait, a different song playing in their heads. A hop, a skip and a step. A casual dribbling movement. A slight droop. A statue like stiffness. Some wandering arms. Some wearing blinders, oblivious to the rest of the world. Some gazes directed to the floor, some to a lost destination.

Some blessed with the company of a similar or different species. Some finding solace in composed tunes. Some communing with nature, some speaking to the self.

A simple walk can be so insightful…

Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Just a little... maybe


There is that little tug you feel
When you see glimpses into what life used to be. When you see assurance of a different kind, that used to exist. All that faith that you once revelled in. All those beliefs, once enough to challenge the world, though now turned to ashes.

There is a little change in the way you think
Just so that the world does not judge you. So that you don’t have to battle your way through acceptance. And the deed has to be done, without compromising on personal ideologies. Without losing your identity.

There is a little hint of an inner voice
A voice that tells you to be true to yourself. To not let an external pressure dominate your reality. To live in what exists and move on from what cannot. A sprinkling of a doubt that should be done away with before it morphs into a mountain.

There is a little compromise
In everything you do. A repetition because first times become a rarity. A lost sense of novelty in times and practices. A stage where you don’t wish to take that extra mile, when fears become a deciding factor.


Some things just seem little... 

Friday, December 14, 2012

The scent


Every person who enters your life, leaves his scent behind... 

It is difficult to describe, but easily identifiable.. That musky fragrance with a hint of cigarette smoke. Your manly sweat mingling with it. I remember how it used to consume me. Fill me from within. Those long embraces, with no knowledge of days or nights. So contagious that it spread all over me, my skin, hair and clothes. That aura, so individual, so you. So irresistibly alluring. That aroma of security, of your presence in my life.

You never revealed to me what it was called. I always wanted to know… Now, every time someone wears it, it reminds me of you. Of those moments I spent in your arms.

That scent of you… it still lingers.
In the deep recesses of my senses, you linger..
Somewhere in a faraway world, we linger…


Thursday, December 13, 2012

Learning...


If only I could question them all and ask, what went wrong where
Scream at them and tell them how they broke me over time
And made me immune to an extent that I stopped getting angry
How the pain they inflicted sent me into a shell and changed my dreams forever
No, I don’t want to hear that voice, not even a whisper
I can remember all that distinct screaming and yelling
And my blood boils the moment I hear that bitter noise
I don’t want to see that face, it reminds me of all those tears
The one that snatched away those laughters
Those roads and streets, that room, let me stay out of it
The wounds may turn fresh again
I saw all of you in a lucid dream, I slapped you’ll and vented my heart
And then there was a sigh of relief, of jubilation
Of years of misery and regrets
I still regret baring myself to you’ll, being an open book
You’ll knew where it’d hurt the most
However much I try I cannot disconnect
We are here in this lifetime bounded by names
Only death can draw the much needed full stop
Yes there was hatred, there was negativity, a lot of it
I have pushed the burden off my heart
But every time I try to forgive, an action you do proves me wrong
I empathize though for all those moments of love and concern
For all its trueness and depth, for its virtues and purity
Now has come the time for me, to lift myself from the mess
To look ahead and not backwards
I know not what the future holds, I have forgotten what it is to hope
Optimism will be born with time
I am learning to trust afresh, understanding love all over again
This feeling of unconditional bliss consumes me
I know not what the world thinks, I know not jealousy and solidarity
I know myself, I know those mistakes
And I know I won’t make them again…