Saturday, July 28, 2012

The transformative phase

I wish I could just stop biting my nails. Sigh! 

So many bad habits to get rid of.
So many cravings to do away with.
Oodles of memories to stash away.
Loads of preparations for the new life ahead.
Umpteen sacrifices to make.

Yes. I have to change myself. Because I do not want the world to see me like this. They won’t accept me. I’d rather reinvent myself. Be a little less possessive about them so that they don’t run miles away from me. Be a little more caring so that I do not lose them altogether. A little presentable to look at so that they don’t judge me. A tad bit responsible so that they trust me. And slightly cold hearted so that they do not fall in love with me. Maybe somewhat resourceful for their benefit. A little serious to be taken seriously.   An iota of strictness for myself so that the world is lenient with me.  A pinch of broad mindedness and tolerance would be an icing on the cake. A teaspoon of patience would do some good. A modest assertiveness to be just at all times. A small amount of humor to cheer those around. A permanent fake smile to wear to clear doubting thoughts. I might have to like things I hate and vice versa. Slightly independent enough to stop bothering others. Governing my own emotions and not being a crybaby. Being a practical bug and not an emotional fool.  Learning to separate two worlds – work and home. Sigh!

So many bad habits to get rid of.
So many cravings to do away with.
Oodles of memories to stash away.
Loads of preparations for the new life ahead.
Umpteen sacrifices to make.

And this may not be the last time…Some call it the beginning...

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