Monday, June 19, 2017

Every time you intentionally ignore a call, or skip a reply, or leave it unread... Remember this

There will come a time that name will never appear on your screen again. You will never hear that voice. Or read those words. Or get a reply when you are badly in need of one.
Maybe that's what you want... Or maybe that is what you dread.

I know the worth of an unanswered message. It haunts me to this day, because you are in another world where whatever I type may reach you, but it will never come back as a name on my screen. I often wonder what that last conversation could have been. If only I could pass on that feeling of valuing someone's presence... to those who choose to not be around, intentionally, even when they can.

When a bridge burns there are two ways to deal with it. Kill the fire and rebuild or just escape like the bridge never existed.

There was a time, I used to be the first kind. Trying to mend broken planks, tying secure knots to fill voids. But some fires are beyond my hands. And over time I realised, some bridges can't be fixed alone. There are chances you'll burn yourself.

So now I let the bridge burn. Maybe add some more fuel to it. So even if you turn around, the smoke of the fire will hide my presence.

And as that last shard falls off, I make my promise to never meet you on the same side again.

Sunday, June 18, 2017

I am heartbroken tonight
Because I thought the wounds had healed
The walls tore down
It bled all over again
As if it were only yesterday

I wish my heart was as cold as my stare
My mind as distant as my feet
I want to cry you out of me
Wipe the slate of my brain clean
Leave no signs of you within me
And no memories around

I was damaged when we met
I thought you could fix me
If not the old me, atleast a better me
But you left me so broken
That the pieces are scattered too far to ever meet

I have no words to say to you
I have no love or forgiveness for you
I just have the pain you left me
Mere questions with no answers
Hoping you will see yourself in my shoes someday
And hoping I'll be there to see you that way



Saturday, March 18, 2017

If only eternal sunshine of the spotless mind was for real
I’d erase every little moment I had with you
Every word you said, every song you played me
Every laughter we shared, every time you broke me
In a matter of a few years I’ll surely have a body you never touched
But what do I do… about this mind…
This mind that can’t pick between loving you or hating you
This mind that wanted you to be a good memory
This mind that now calls you a regret

Saturday, September 10, 2016

I am drifting far, away from your orbit. Into the outer space. I do not know where I am headed. Will it be a galaxy many light years away or a black hole that will consume my being? Will I collide with a meteor and shower onto a new world, and then spin madly with it? Will I find another star that will awaken life on me? Will I be attracted to another gravity?
So many big bangs gone, I am still a universe in the making.

Sunday, August 28, 2016

Time travel helps.

Sometimes you rush into the past to gain strength, confidence in knowing what you had and what you were. Sometimes it’s just a quest for the real, especially in a pretentious ‘now’.  You go back all the way, just so you believe, that the today is not what’s truly meant for you, that you are something, way different.

And then there are some of us who would rather tour tomorrow. Build castles in thin air. Create memories of a time yet to come. Some of us dare to imagine, dare to be broken.

And yet, time travel seems so much more real, so much more closer to my heart than the present…

Monday, July 18, 2016

There's an innate kind of beauty in what's broken.. In pieces that are not afraid to don any shape. Each crack having a mind and direction of its own. Unfazed, not conforming to appearances. Collecting reflections of different suns, bursting into their most honest colors. Put them against a group of mirrors and they'll evolve into the prettiest of patterns. Leave them aside and they'll cut you when you least expect it. But when you bring them all together, mend them, they form a replica of a previous creation.
We are broken pieces of a complete form, wrecked by multiple storms, fixed to last, over and over again. But however much we try to cover the scars or seal the gaps, we can never go back to perfect completion. We can ever be wholes, because we leave pieces of ourselves into it all. That's the beauty of what's broken.

Sunday, July 17, 2016

What does cold feel like?
Is it a shiver waiting to be silenced? Is it a breeze that soothes the skin? Is it the sand in the desert at night? Or the cubes of ice swimming in intoxication? Is it a flame gone out? Is it a companion of the darkness? Is it the snowflake that lands on the palm or the tear that wets the lips? Is it a heart that can't love anymore or a one that's burnt to ashes?